Many of us have days and times when we think…we just aren’t good enough. We think that whatever efforts or hardwork we put in, we just can’t reach there. People may think that they are the weird ones for thinking like that. But in reality, most of at some point of our lives feel that way.
We tend to be most unforgiving of our own faults and mistakes. This is why we often sometimes hear the phrase that we can be our worst enemies. It is because our thoughts constantly express how we are flawed and are at fault all the time.
Let’s see what are the several ways that lead us to thinking so.
We compare us with others. It’s no mystery that everyone’s lives, situations and personalities are different. No two people are exactly the same. Everyone’s chapters of their books are different. Then, why is it that we forget this small but important detail when we critically compare ourselves with others? We must remember that there’s always going to be someone smarter, richer, prettier than us. So are we going to make our own lives miserable for constantly thinking about things that the other person has or are we going to be thankful for what we currently have? Chances are that the person we are envious of, is actually envious of us. They might wish that they had something we have! So we will always be miserable if we get stuck in this endless cycle of constant comparison.
Talking down to ourselves. By doing this, we allow our insecurities and fears get the best of us. It ultimately makes us overthink and feel like we just aren’t capable of doing something. We often have cruel and discouraging thoughts from time to time. We forget that these are just thoughts. In reality, we ourselves have the capability of deciding to think what we want to think. More importantly, don’t be so quick to believe everything you think. Because our thoughts are dynamic in nature. So if we are having negative thoughts, and we put in just a little bit of effort and be a little bit optimistic, these same negative thoughts will change into the positive ones.
Our worst traits don’t define who we are. We all have flaws. We all have some positive traits too. But sometimes, we think that our worst traits define us. For example, I may be horrendous at maths to the point of having to take a retest. But at the same time, I am really good at history so much so that I received a scholarly certificate for that. Now it’s up-to me, whether I want to crib about being bad at maths and stay negative or think about my positive traits and push myself to the extent that I become unbeatable at history. We always have the choice of thinking about our traits in a positive and negative light. We must remember that we are always in control of what we think. Being kind to yourself is just as important as being kind to others.
You are always enough. We are always a work in progress till the very moment we die. As long as we have a will to improve ourselves and become a better version of ourselves, we are always enough. We don’t have to be so harsh on ourselves because everyone has imperfections. Everyone has flaws. But that does not mean that we have to be cruel towards ourselves to the extent that we start believing our thoughts of being ‘worthless’. Because you are definitely worth it.
So, what point did you relate with the most? That is the one you have to work on. Take your time. The only person who you owe any explanation is you. Be who you truly are instead of hiding away your insecurities in a box. Because true happiness, is not just a destination it’s the road of getting through which you ultimately loving yourself.